moooooving

i am moving to word press :/ 

im gonna be honest, it is MUCH harder to use and i dont really like it, but my best friend has it so therefore it will make it much easier if we have the same kind of blog......

laurenmjohnson.wordpress.com

see you theree!

heyheyhey

"hey stephen. hey hey hey.

hey stephen i could think of 50 reasons why i should be the one you choose

all those other girls, well their beautiful.. but would they write a song for you?"

today is so sunny, i love it. last night was so windy. it was so fun running up hills, counting the cars, looking at the non exsistent stars, and being with great friends. i just need to enjoy what i have and live for the moment "dont analyze your blessings" . gosh that is so hard for me not to do though. i am suuuch an analyzer.

" Im not your princess, this ain't your fairytale."

"people are people and sometimes we change our minds"

so anyways. here goes to living for the moment. not planning for the future an not looking back. just sitting here, on my bed, talking to someone special, and letting the day flow as it is meant.

"and we know its never simple, never easy. never a clean break. and i cant breathe without you, but i have to"

p.s ^all the quotes are from the songs i was listening to when i wrote this..

is it possible?

is it possible for the unexpected to happen? is it possible for it to not be a joke? is love at first sight possible? i never thought it was, but have i contradicted myself? all these excited thoughts going through my head but to make sure i just need to wait. so excited for love, is this healthy? i wanna make sure i'm doing the right thing. i cant afford any more hurt right now. this is wierd. this is exciting. is this right? have i been missing this in all my past? maybe its just a feeling you get when you grow up. wow. this is really exciting.

:)

Fearless

listen to Fearless by taylor swift. believe in miracles. live for the unknown. good things come unexpectantly, thats what im figuring out. lovelovelove.

imperfectness and random thoughts on a sunny day.

"well i'm the icing, on the cake. i'm the secret ingrediant your missing... im the chance you chose, not to take"

her words. so amazing. i love Tristan Prettyman. she is so honest with her thoughts and they come out so nicely. if i'm ever able to write a song as good as hers i will be so happy. you know what ive realized? i've realized that we make life way more complicated then it needs or is supposed to be.  we are over analytical humans who tend to lose perspective from time to time. 

like last night. i really lost it. i do think that some of the the people were unnecessary but my focus shouldn't have been directed in that way. i should have put my head into focus onto what i was really there for. to have fun with my friends. 

i have realized that i really hate imperfectness. I HATE IT. i know i will learn though, sometimes.. hopefully, soon. 

also, i feel like theres marriage, couples, love in that way, and pda circling around me. everyones getting boyfriends, everyones getting married, everyone has found their prince charming, except me. maybe this is a little risky to write about on the internet knowing that anyone can read this but you know what? i dont care, im going to be real. i do not understand. i really dont. i know God has something planned for me so special that i cant even imagine, but why do i have to go through all this hurt to get to that? why cant there be just ONE person to prove that there not allll jerks. sorry if you think i'm being prejudiced but i've had a fair share of expieriences that i believe i can say that. 

Jesus loves me. Jesus wants me. Jesus is always with me. Jesus gives me peace. Jesus is my bestfriend. Jesus is my love. Jesus is enough. 

a time to help, a time to change

so recently i have been feeling really called to do charity work. its something i feel really strongly for and i have been praying and asking God to show me which path he wants me to go on. there's so many charities.. at first i really felt that God wanted me to do something on underage drinking because it is something that people i know already deal with and i want to spread awareness on the effects of it.  but there's also other things that i want to be apart of such as being involved at homeless shelters and helping with some sort of cancer... now i feel like God doesn't care what i do, i just have to do SOMETHING. i cant sit here and watch and feel bad for these people without actually doing something about it.  so ive done some research and this is what ive come up with..

* at The Orange County Rescue Mission, they are in urgent need of food, such as :

- cereals

- Macaroni and Cheese

- Pasta (all kinds)

- Cup of Noodles

- Peanut Butter

- Jelly

- Instant Mashed Potatoes

- Instant Rice

- Breakfast bars

- Sugar

- Coffee

these things are all very inexpensive and theres probably something that you might even have that you've just never used and probably wont. i think a food drive would be to much for me to put on by myself but i really want to get some of these things donated to them.. if you want to help of have any ideas, let me know!

secondly, i was at a schooling fundraiser today and they had a bunch of booths. i came across one called "The Joyful Foundation" and i really believe in what they do. they make fleece blankets for patients to use as their getting chemotherapy because i guess it gets really cold in the treatment room. they are in much need of volunteers though. they donate to many childrens centers.. they are only able to donate 50 blankets per month when the center needs 50 per day! that is a crazy goal to accomplish but it just makes me want to help them out even more.. They have blanket workshops on every 4th tuesday of the month from 6:30-9. Im going to try to make it to the next one, let me know if your interested!

www.joyfulfoundation.org

www.rescuemission.org

 

make a difference.

Change

i feel like im changing. and to me i feel its in a good way. but to other people i dont know if the like it so much. recently, ive been so much more oblivious and quite. and people are constantly asking me if im okay or if im being "pissy" or if im sad and its just like what the heck! i have no idea what im doing for people to think that. im just more quite because i think alot more now. i dont want all my thoughts and conversations to be so worldly. im perfectly at peace walking by myself sometimes, i dont need someone glued to my hip at every moment. its kinda funny actually, i dont know what has brought on this change. but i like it. and i think God does too. 

on past events.. things have been way confusing. but now its over, so i can just move on. i feel like whenever i move away from a situation, i have to look back. people say "dont look back" but how could i not? it was good while it lasted. i just want something new. i just need to wait. 

things keep changing. but God stays the same. the SAME. he never changes.. how reassuring that feels. 

today i think im going to sants monica. yes. and tommorrow ill be running in this thing called the dino dash..

oh, and i love everyone right now. i love you friends.